Most common causes of divorce

Trouble with the in-laws, differences of opinion about having children, a cheating spouse, sexual problems and money are the major causes for divorce as cited by psychiatrists, divorce lawyers and related professionals.

We rank the most common symptoms of divorce, explaining why most marriages end up null and void.

Lack of commitment towards marriage, sexual incompatibility and infidelity

Whether infidelity is the result of deteriorating relations within marriage or a cause in itself remains the most common cause of divorce, occurring in more than half of failed marriages. A lack of commitment, philandering and infidelity contributes to distrust amongst partners and stems from resentment or anger with the other half and sexual boredom.

Lack of communication between spouses

A communication breakdown creates distance between partners. Growing differences between couples are the greatest contributors to ineffective communication ranging from personal and career goals to expectations about household tasks and finances. Interestingly enough, those who cohabit before marriage have higher rates of divorce than people who don’t as differences tend to become major focal points over the course of time, creating discontent and frustration with longstanding inconveniences.

Unmatched expectations cause rifts and personality conflicts amongst partners unwilling to compromise and is heightened when material needs are unfulfilled.

Physical, Emotional and Substance Abuse

Whether it’s a seemingly harmless verbal taunt or violent physical manhandling, abuse is a form of consistent negative reinforcement. An ultimate irreconcilable difference, Abuse provides definite grounds for divorce where either spouse is frequently abusive towards children or each other.

Alcohol addiction and substance abuse leads to drastic changes in the behavioural pattern of the addict. Often more than one can handle, the situation is compounded when both partners resort to using narcotics, adversely impacting on the mental, physical and emotional stability of the couple and ultimately ending in divorce.

Financial Issues

Economic strain and financial burdens is one of the most common reasons for the collapse of marriage. Disintegrating financial circumstances, incurred debts and disagreements over the allocation of money is sometimes all it takes enough to end an already aggravated marriage.

Why money is the leading cause of divorce

Money enables people to buy many things; unfortunately, it can't buy happiness, love or a lasting relationship. And surprisingly, money turns out to be the leading cause of today's divorces.

Fifty-seven percent of divorced couples in the United States cited financial problems as the primary reason for the demise of their marriage. according to a survey conductted by Citibank.

Financial incompatibility is one way of explaining the reason money is the primary cause of divorce, says Cheryl D. Broussard, a registered investment advisor and author of the book The Black Woman's Guide To Financial Independence: Smart Ways To Take Charge Of Your Money, Build Wealth, and Achieve Financial Security.

Financial compatibility "has a lot to do with how people are raised," cites Broussard, who is a principal of Broussard & Douglas, Inc., located in Palo Alto, CA. "Women want an equal partnership, but men want to take the lead if that's how they were raised."

The corrupting effect financial incompatibility has on a marriage is compounded when couples don't discuss their financial problems.

Broussard says, People aren't discussing finances. Money is such a taboo subject. People associate bad things with money. If you're in a serious relationship, talk about this. If you don't, it will cause a huge gap."

Bonnie Fitch, an attorney from Houston, TX, who is a former associate municipal court judge, says money may be the leading cause of divorce because some couples do not unite and work together when it comes to handling their household finances.

What Do Men Want in a Potential Wife - Solid Guidelines Every Woman Out There Must Follow

Men have different expectations and look for varied number of things while thinking of a life partner. Most men like a woman who is a total package, someone with looks, intellect, a career and a super mom material. Though the initial criteria could be a good looking woman, they do look for things far deeper.
Emotionally stable and positive person
Men prefer woman with a positive attitude towards life and one that has cheerful and a happy personality. They feel that a woman's temperament has an influence on the house and if she radiates warmth and positive energy, the house has an energized atmosphere. On the other hand if she is sad or a depressing person it spreads negative energy in the house.
A confident woman
In modern times men are essentially drawn to woman who are self assured and can take care of themselves in the competitive world. Whether it is at home or at the work place, they would like the woman who can deal with the challenges effectively and calmly.
Someone with mental compatibility
One of the attributes men consider in a woman is whether or not she is on the same plane mentally. They would like their wife to be aware of current issues and with whom they can hold intelligent and stimulating conversation.
A career woman
A big plus point for men is when the woman is career oriented. Whether or not she can contribute financially to build their life together, someone who can share the burden is also important. In today's demanding world a woman with a focus and goals is an attractive proposition.
A woman with beauty
Men are first attracted to the physical beauty before they get to know their woman better. That, they want a good looking women for their wife is a no brainer, each man has his own expectations of what they like in their woman.
A woman's motherly instincts
Dating helps to know and understand each other better and men who are interested in long term relationship are looking for the feminine traits in their woman who can be a good mother to their children. Motherliness is a trait all men would like to see in a woman.
Woman's spiritual side is a big plus
Many men are drawn to women who are devout and have belief and respect for the omnipresent God. It gives them the strength of character and makes them stable and balanced person. Men believe that it makes them a better person too when they have a wife who is a believer.

The Power of True Love

A marriage is not possible without love or even if there is, the marriage will not last long. This has been a common case to individuals vowed by their parents and not by their own accord. It is really a different thing when the parents get in the way and decide for you. It may be hard for the parents to accept it, but you should decide on your own. You should choose the one you love so you must be brave to tell your parents your feelings because if not, you will end up being committed to a person you don't even love. It is not the parents that will suffer in this situation but it is you.

Trust is a key factor in having a successful married life. A relationship without this factor is nothing but trash. Arguments will occur often when a couple do not trust each other. It is because you will always doubt that your partner is not being faithful to you. In order for a couple to gain trust with each other, they should have communication. Allotting a certain amount of time for you to talk about your everyday experiences is a good exercise to gain trust to each other. You should also talk about problems you are facing in order for you to be able to materialize a solution for the problem.Not only will you gain trust but you will also understand each other. Communication can lead to knowing each others similarities and differences and also your weaknesses and strengths. Knowing all of these, you can help each other overcome your weaknesses and cope with your differences.

The best factor that affects good relationship is love. To think that even divorced people can still be reconciled, love is really very powerful. Love should be present in order to have a good and successful relationship. It is because if you really love a person, you will face even the strongest hurricanes just to be with the person you love. A marriage is said to be successful when love is in the midst of the two people involved. No matter what trials they face, still they stand firm and do not falter.

The power of love can really conquer anything. No matter what trials you will have to face, as long as there is love in your midst, they will be nothing but a piece of cake. A strong relationship is composed of good communication, trust to each other, and love. If you love a person very much and the feeling is mutual, only then can you trust. You can communicate with someone without loving her but it won't be that effective in a relationship. Everything can be ruined when even one of these factors is not present.

True love is really a powerful tool in maintaining a good relationship. Add it with trust and communication and everything will work out just fine.

Learn To Communicate Better With Your Partner - Learn To Listen More Effectively

Have you ever been talking to someone about something important to you and realized they were not listening to a thing you had said? That really stinks and I am sure we have all experienced that at some point. American Law expert and founder John Marshall once said "To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to speak well.
One of the biggest problems in relationships is that people have stopped listening to one another.
Unfortunately for most people they have forgotten they were given two ears and only one mouth, they like to speak much more than they like to listen. Listening is the most overlooked part of the communication process. So how can you become a better listener:
Give your partner your undivided attention. Put aside your text messages, books, and other distractions and focus on what the other person is saying. It has been shown in studies that people who "multi-task" actually have a net loss. What I mean is that the brain can only work on one thing at a time and with multi-tasking it is just jumping between the things rapidly. When you focus on one thing, for instance someone who is speaking to you, and save the other things for later you get more efficient use of your brain's power.

When you become a better listener you become better at your relationship. Especially the relationship that matters most which is the one with the partner that you love the most.

Have you ever been talking to someone about something important to you and realized they were not listening to a thing you had said? That really stinks and I am sure we have all experienced that at some point. American Law expert and founder John Marshall once said "To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to speak well.
One of the biggest problems in relationships is that people have stopped listening to one another.
Unfortunately for most people they have forgotten they were given two ears and only one mouth, they like to speak much more than they like to listen. Listening is the most overlooked part of the communication process. So how can you become a better listener:
Give your partner your undivided attention. Put aside your text messages, books, and other distractions and focus on what the other person is saying. It has been shown in studies that people who "multi-task" actually have a net loss. What I mean is that the brain can only work on one thing at a time and with multi-tasking it is just jumping between the things rapidly. When you focus on one thing, for instance someone who is speaking to you, and save the other things for later you get more efficient use of your brain's power.

When you become a better listener you become better at your relationship. Especially the relationship that matters most which is the one with the partner that you love the most.

Relationship Advice - Don't Get Your Love Advice From Friends Unless They Have A Great Relationship

Relationship advice does work. But, how effective it is, depends on where you get the advice. If you are asking for relationship tips from your friends and their relationships are less than desirable, then following that advice will only lead to more relationship problems.
If you want to mend the problems that are plaguing your relationship, you need to seek advice that is tried, tested and proven with real world experience. Go and actively seek people who have great relationships.
Look around you, who are the people who have a super great relationship? Ask them for advice on how to improve your present situation. If they've been married awhile, they should be able to give great marriage advice.
If your dealing with a long distance relationship issue, you need to get advice on how to keep the romance alive despite the distance. Many couples face this situation on a daily basis because of work and manage to keep their relationship strong. They do work if you put the time into making them work.
Great advice is available if you are willing to seek it out and act upon it. If you just get advice but fail to take action on it or fail to implement it, you are just wasting your time and do not seriously want to improve your situation